Monthly Archives: January 2014

Today’s -see 1/31/2014

YOUR story is more important when YOU tell it,
and is as affordable as YOU sell it.

How much YOU cost.

Only YOU know everything that YOU have been through. Only YOU have the experience of having had experienced everything that YOU have. They think that they know YOU. Sometimes YOU even think that there is someone that has a very strong idea or sense of who YOU are and what YOU are because of all that YOU have gone through or had to deal with or have been part of, but really, they have no idea.

It is comfortable and quite pleasing to be able to share authentically and honestly YOUR identity and the “ins and outs” of YOU. It is a necessary component of being able to process this process that we consider life. We need to share who we are. Some of us do that with our time or our energy. Some people do it with their compassion and kindness. Some people do it with their talent or through a special gift or skill that they share. And this is how people come to “know” YOU. That thing that YOU do most often, most consistently, is normally what most people believe to be YOUR true identity. And if YOU are doing, on a consistent basis, the thing that YOU love, YOU are eventually known for the thing that YOU love. There is no greater feeling than that. Doing what YOU love. And being known for it. And being paid for it! On the other hand, many of us do either what we were told to do or told we had to do or whatever was the thing that was what we found as a last resort, or a convenient one. And maybe we are good at it. Or get liked for it. And some of us get paid, and even well paid, for it. And we become known for that thing. And it consumes us. It eats away our time and energy and it deprives us of our peace of mind. But we do it for “ever’s” and long after the “meantime” that we once thought that it would last. Because we never intended to do it forever. We thought that it would just get us to where we were trying to go. To what we loved. It was supposed to do that, get us the money, or the resources, or the connections, in order to one day give us the opportunity at being who we really wanted to be.

If YOU don’t come to it, it won’t come to YOU…

People are creatures of habit. Not just the habits that they themselves maintain but they maintain a sense of familiarity and recognition with what YOUR habits are. If YOU habitually lie, YOU will be known as a liar. If YOU habitually run away from confrontation, YOU will be known as irresponsible or immature. If YOU have chosen to spend most of YOUR time and energy at a job or in a place or with people that are not exactly what YOU have as a desire for YOURSELF, YOU will still be known for or by these things. So if YOU are an aspiring dancer but have spent most of YOUR days and energy employed behind a desk, people will know YOU as a desk worker. Maybe YOUR heart is set on living in a different place other than where YOU are at the moment, the truth is that no one knows how important that relocation is to YOU, as much as YOU do. And the people that YOU spend most of YOUR time with say a lot about YOU. No matter what YOU say, people don’t see “act-like”, they see actions. They don’t always see that YOU are pretending or just passing time, they see who YOU have around YOU most as YOUR preference. And YOU will be known by those people, YOU will be known as one of them. That is where “birds of a feather…” rings true. At least from what people can see.

And YOU will pay for it…

Sometimes we get into the rut of wondering why people don’t believe in us or why they don’t support us, or why they don’t take us seriously. Well in some of these cases, the answer is this:

They do not believe us.
We haven’t always given them something to support.
We don’t appear to take ourselves seriously.

It is that simple. It is not an agenda against YOU. It is not that they are “hating” on YOU. It is not that “they”, whomever YOU perceive or pretend “them” to be, don’t want to see YOU “make it”. They just don’t know that YOU. And the reality is that the people that may know of that YOU, don’t see enough of it to believe in it, or take it seriously, or to financially, emotionally, or consistently, support it. And that will cost YOU! It will force YOU to maintain whatever mediocrity or madness that is YOUR everyday routine and regimen in order to survive. But know that YOU are not just here to survive. Being alive is survival, YOU are here to succeed! YOU are here to try. YOU are here to do! YOU are here to make something happen. YOU deserve to be happy. YOU deserve to fulfill the desires of YOUR heart.

And that will help YOU.
It will more than help someone else.

People don’t always follow what they hear, they follow what they see. YOU are not always known for what YOU know, YOU are known for what YOU show! And people need to see YOU doing it, doing whatever the something that YOU do, is. YOU need to see YOURSELF doing it. YOU need to believe that it is possible because YOU made it possible. YOU need to follow YOUR heart. And if YOU need to make adjustments or amend the vision, it is better to find out by having tried than to discover what it is not because of only having thought about it. And if YOU have children, know that they are following YOUR lead. As well as anyone else that YOU are exposing to who YOU are pretending to be.

They buy or know what YOU sell, mediocrity or magnificence, by YOU selling it. Can YOU afford that?


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers


Today’s -see 1/30/2014

It was wrong;
It was YOUR right.

The direction YOU took.

YOU made that choice. No matter whatever YOUR reasoning or recourse was, it was a decision that YOU made. YOU can come up with all types and kinds of excuses or facts to justify, from YOUR position, why YOU did whatever it was that YOU did but the truth is that YOU did it. So the decision that hurt someone or harmed someone or betrayed or manipulated or took advantage of or misled or completely damaged or destroyed someone, whether YOU intended to or not, was YOUR fault. YOU are responsible. YOU made that happen. It was YOUR lies or mistruths. It was YOUR immaturity. It was YOUR irresponsibility. It was YOUR reaction to whatever happened that led to or up to whatever the circumstances that eventually took place. It was YOUR idea. It was YOUR plan. It was YOUR mistake. Whether it was YOUR intent or not is a matter only YOU are sure to know, but it is irrelevant, because the fact is that whatever it was that happened, did, and YOU are the reason it did.

And it may not have been a “someone” that YOU hurt. What happened some time ago may have been where YOU destroyed “YOU”. YOU may be the person YOU hurt or harmed or misled. YOU might be the one that was delayed or distracted because of a decision that changed everything. Maybe someone else, or people, were involved but maybe they got over it. May be that they expected it. Expected it of people or just of life, or maybe they expected it of YOU. So maybe the person that YOU think YOU setback or set up was able to set aside the differences and instead set themselves on the right pace and path to move on. Maybe they forgave YOU or they forgot YOU. Maybe they are grateful to YOU because they learned a vicious but valuable lesson. Maybe they have long since realized that there was nothing different or deliberate that they could have done in order to avoid whatever transpired. So maybe they got over it. May be that they kept moving. May be that YOU are the one stuck.

And YOU are not the only one… YOU-ARE-NOT-ALONE!
(YOU are definitely not alone.)

We are all different. Like really different. Not just that we look different or sound different or come from different places. More than that we dress different and have different taste, likes and dislikes, and different attitudes, demeanors, and dispositions. We are raised differently and exposed to different cultures and religions and faiths and beliefs and ideologies. We have different attitudes and feelings and we interpret our surroundings differently according to our own individual differences. Even in our similarities we are extremely different. Siblings, for example, raised in the same environment, for the exact period of time, with the same exposure to as many similarities as possible, are still going to have differences. We think differently. We act differently.

YOUR “difference”…

YOU have YOUR own path. YOU will discover YOUR way on YOUR own journey. As much as YOU may want or be willing to follow after an expression or example of someone else’s, YOU are going to make YOUR way, YOUR way. And that way, is going to be different. YOU have to own that. YOU have to stand up to that. YOU have to recognize and realize what comes with that and YOU have to deal with it. Before YOU are ever able to “be” it.

About the way YOU went…

YOU are entitled to YOU and the truth is that YOU are not always going to get it right. YOU are not always going to do the right thing at the right time for the right result. YOU will not always say or do the right things that please people and satisfy the wants and/or needs of everyone. YOU are not going to be perfect. Not if perfect, for you, means flawless or without error or without trouble or without mistake. YOU are never going to meet the expectations of that kind of perfection. And it is YOUR right to not be. YOU get to be normal, and let me tell YOU, perfect is not the norm. No, the perfection that is normality is found in the differences. And those differences include some things that would make whatever YOU did or think YOU did, seem like nothing, absolutely nothing, in comparison to what other people go through. Because the truth is that some of those “other” people didn’t make it. And YOU did. And YOU get to accept that. And YOU get to apologize. And YOU get to assume responsibility. And YOU get to move on. Even if “moving on” means that YOU get to leave who YOU once were for who YOU now are, for who YOU are destined to be. And YOU get to start over. Everyday. YOU get to right the wrongs. Fine tune the idiosyncrasies. Adjust the imbalances. Correct the mistakes. Change the way YOU are done.

And no matter how wrong it was, YOU are the difference, YOU are different, and YOU get to make it right!


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Today’s -see 1/29/2014

There is such a thing as anything that does something towards getting YOU everything that YOU need in order to be or do whatever thing or things necessary for YOU to have the one thing that YOU are after.

That “thing” that YOU are.

Something happened to YOU. Or something didn’t happen for YOU. Something got in YOUR way. YOU let something stop YOU. YOU were waiting on/for something. Something was supposed to produce something for YOU that would/could/should have made all the difference in the world.

Something in YOU…

Time is unchanging. The way we measure it changes. What we call it changes. How we use or utilize it is ever-changing. But time does not change. So in respect to the fact that we all have possession of the exact same amount of time in any given present that we are alive, the fact is that there is no difference in time to us. So, time is not the thing.

Information is available. There is so much information available. Information, but for the fact that time is the bookend to all existence, would be the most abundant resource available. The information that YOU need definitely exists. With the Internet as it is currently, access to information is more readily and tangibly possible. YOU can get the information. So, information is not the thing.

Money. The way the world works. The means. The sum of the equation that is [time + information =]. The resource that gets most jobs done. The intrinsic value of our “value” system. As the Wu-Tang Clan so notably put it, The C.R.E.A.M, Cash Rules Everything Around Me. Yes, the money! Well, truth is that there is a lot of money out there. And there are millions of ways to get it. There are hustles and careers alike. At the same time, money is just paper or metal. Sometimes it’s just digits on paper or on a screen or in a system. It doesn’t really exist. It’s value is determined according to our perception and/or respect of it. The truth is that the same thing that might cost YOU a billion dollars to get, can be just as well given to YOU for free. So, the fact is, money is not the thing.

Neither is location. Nor status. Nor popularity. Nor situation. Nor condition. Nor disability. Nor hinderance. Nor limitation. Nor relationship. Nor assumption. Nor perception. Nor job. Nor title. Nor network. Nor group. Nor party. Nor government. Nor idea. Nor success. Nor failure.

None of these, or no other thing, are the “thing” that… YOU ARE!

YOU make the difference! YOU are the difference. Those other “things” matter not but for whatever they matter to YOU! And the real thing is, those “things” are NOTHING, mean nothing, say nothing, matter not, without YOU! YOU give these things value. They are all figments and fragments, made real and possible by virtue of YOUR perception. YOU are the thing that makes them the anything that they ever achieve. As an example, time being the sample thing, what time means to one other person is not what time means to YOU. YOU see time differently. YOU use and utilize YOUR time differently. Time by itself would stand still if not given life by motion and movement. YOUR motion and YOUR movement are what define time. Time does not define YOU. Over time YOU will begin, become, and be, but time does not determine that, YOU DO! Because YOU exist is why time is relevant. Without YOU, time does not matter. And the same applies to any one of those other “things”. Money, Information, Relationships, Friendships, Professions, Networks, Governments, and so on. YOU don’t matter because of those things, they matter because of YOU!

YOU as the thing that YOUR thing is…

The difference between what two people have, given that they are in possession of the very same thing, is what they individually, of their own volition, do with it. Ultimately who they are with it. In the end, who they are. So the equation would be a set of factors, factored in, matter-of-factly, as a matter of facts, equalling what matters based on what those things matter, to YOU. YOU being the variable. YOU being the thing that makes those things make whatever sense, or cents, or “since”, that they do. For what I mean by “since”, YOU were _______ until YOU got _______ and ever since, YOU have been _______. So “since” represents what YOU are as a result of. “Cents” represent what YOU have as a result of. “Sense” represents what YOU think/feel as a result of. But the result is YOU. More importantly, the reason was YOU!

Do YOUR thing…

So, YOU have a want, an idea, a plan, a need. YOU have a power, a talent, a gift, a service. YOU have a dream, a goal, a purpose, a potential. And so much more. YOU also have a past, some problems, some issues, some trouble. YOU have some obstacles, YOU have some trials, YOU have some things YOU have to figure out. YOU have some mountains to climb, some forgiveness to seek, some relationships to try to rebuild. And YOU have to make something happen. Like right now. And YOU could rattle off a list and litany of things that could help YOU achieve this progress. More time, more money, more information, more help, more access, more yadayadayadayada…

All YOU really need is more YOU. YOU are the best thing that YOU have going for YOURSELF. YOU are going to make it happen with YOU. If someone helps, they will help because of YOU. If something happens, it will happen because of YOU. YOU are the start and the finish of everything that has to do with YOU. And today is YOURS!

And that is the most important thing, that YOU have today, and YOU can use the one thing that YOU do know that YOU have, YOU, to start or continue to do the thing or things that will eventually or continue to get YOU where YOU want or are going to be. And that’s the thing that matters!


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Today’s -see 1/28/2014

It is definitely worth a try. It is worth it.YOU are it.

Give YOU a try.

There is someone that is going to appreciate and find reason to celebrate YOU no matter where or who YOU are. That is just the truth. No matter what YOUR position or profession, there is someone who needs YOU to be that very thing. There are crowds of adoring support and parades of roaring agreement no matter what it is YOU have decided to do or be. It is natural and quite ordinary to find comfort and “fit” in places and around people that compliment or conveniently accommodate YOUR choices and decisions, whatever they are. Whether YOU are being less than or greater than whatever it is YOU could or are aspired to be, there will be room for YOU. Mediocrity or magnificence, whatever the case or costume, people, and YOU, YOURSELF, will have and find a reason for YOU to be right where YOU are. And that is life, success and failure both have their own set of supporters. Because “perspective” is the true matter of justification in life. People need YOU according to their needs, and YOU are no different than people, YOU have needs and when those needs are being met and satisfied, YOU will definitely find reason to be okay with it, from a matter of perspective of course.

But is that YOU?…

Life happens. Things happen. Time passes. Before YOU know it, dreams and hopes and wishes become deadlines, due dates, and desperate measures. Where YOU once optimistically aspired to venture out and try and pursue, YOU may now find YOURSELF in a whirlwind of “reality” and obligation, and responsibility. YOU have created lanes for YOURSELF or YOU have created conditions that only open up certain lanes to YOU. So those “when I grow up, I want to be” dreams become “doing what I have to do to get what I can” situations. And more life happens. And more things happen. And more time passes. And then lost in the translation and transition of that time are the long ago hopes and desires of the heart. And YOU suffer for that. The people around YOU suffer for that. And that suffering gives way to remorse and regret. That gives way to doubt and depression. That gives way to anger and fear. And so on. And what was once possible is not even an option at some point. And these dynamics are the culprits that design the mess and mediocrity that we pass on to our children and as lessons in our community. This is what they learn because this is what we have taught them.

But it’s not too late…

Have YOU ever given “YOU” a try? Think about that question. Think about that question for real. Consider that wherever YOU are at the moment is only a reflection of what YOU feel, what YOU desire, what YOU “think” about YOURSELF, and how YOU interpret these perceptions. Whatever YOUR level of status or position is, YOU are a product of the atmosphere and environment that YOU subject and surrender YOURSELF to. And this becomes a cycle, a cycle that pedals YOU into YOUR eventual legacy. Not just what YOU know, but what YOU are ultimately known, or remembered, for.

Are YOU okay with who that “YOU” is?…

The truth is that people are going to be happy no matter who YOU are. Someone is going to be impressed or satisfied with whatever YOU are doing and the fact is that no matter what YOUR situation is, someone has it worse. We often use that philosophy to justify our own mediocrity or to explain or excuse our laziness. We will begin to assert that we are “needed” and we don’t want to disappoint or let down or mess up what someone else expects of us. Many of us make lives and lifestyles out of this thinking. And from the outside, it looks good, real good, on some people.

But YOU know the truth…

YOU know what YOUR dream was. YOU know what YOUR dream is! YOU know what YOU have always wanted to do. YOU know where YOUR heart is. YOU know what YOU believe YOU are capable of. YOU know what YOU really want. YOU know what YOU really want to do. YOU know how YOU really feel. It’s YOU that can’t sleep well. It’s YOU that is not eating right. It is YOU that is out of shape or sync. It is YOU that feels the way YOU do. It’s YOU that has to deal with it. And it trickles down. YOU are passing this on. YOU are passing this around. This is how people see YOU. This is how YOU see YOURSELF.

As a child YOU had a dream. Let’s just say that that dream was to be a professional athlete. And YOU were talented. YOU had promise. YOU had potential. And YOU may have been on the track to doing that. And maybe life just happened. Or YOU fell victim to unfortunate circumstances. Or maybe YOU lost out because YOU didn’t have the resources or support that was necessary to open up doors and grant YOU further opportunities. Or maybe YOU doubted YOURSELF. Or maybe YOU let others doubt YOU down and YOU gave up. And life happened. And things happened. And time passed. And now YOU are long past the age of being a professional athlete.

Well, now YOU make an adjustment.

There is a “YOU” in a little kid that has all the potential and the power that YOU once had. The best YOU can do today is to give that kid the information that they need to get where they want to be and YOU can do that. As well as whatever YOUR next dream was. Because it’s not too late for all of the dreams that YOU had. So YOU can’t play the game, well be a coach, be a trainer, be a consultant, be an investor, be an owner! Be an avid supporter. Be a part of the team.

Or whatever YOU want to be…

It is not too late for YOU! YOUR worse fear should be continuing to settle for a mediocre YOU! At least try. Give it a shot. Give YOU a shot. Take a leap of faith. Take a STAND! Take YOUR place in the race that YOU have always wanted to run and know that if YOU run strong, YOU will finish strong. And don’t worry about what “place” YOU get because in the race to be “YOU”, YOU have an advantage. YOU have the edge. YOU are the best at that.

And YOU will win!


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Thank you… (Moving on)

Hey guys…

I wanted to send out a thank you to everyone who has allowed me to be their personal barber for these past few years. I am so grateful and appreciative of your loyalty and patronage of my services. Yesterday, January 26, 2014, I packed up my clippers and have decided to step from “behind the chair” and end my profession as a barber. There are many reasons that I can give as to why I chose to do this now but the truth is that I can no longer hope or dream of all the things that I want and desire of myself yet sit in this place of comfort and routine that, for me, has long stopped producing significant benefit to my life, or my situation. I love the industry. I believe in the power of the barbershop in our community. I understand the medium and what the platform is capable of doing towards the good of what our community needs. I am aware of how necessary barbers and stylist are and their influence and power in the community. I understand the relationships that are fostered and cultivated in that space. And I am aware of the possibility! I am all too familiar with the potential!

I have been cutting hair for more than 20 years. I have been in and around barbershops for almost that same amount of time. I have met and become friend and acquaintance with hundreds, if not thousands of people and I have encountered ten times that amount. More than just meeting them, or cutting their hair, I’ve listened to them, I’ve heard their stories, I’ve learned so much from them. I’ve studied humanity and human nature through the relationships and experiences so afforded me as a barber. I have learned and honed a skill that will always be with me and I will pass on to my son and will continue to utilize in the capacity of service and charity as I have decided to dedicate and donate my services to local charities, and community out-reaches, churches, group homes, etc., from now on. I will always be able to be a barber. I enjoy it. But there is so much more to me and for me.

As you may or may not know, my passion is writing. I am a poet. I am an author. I am an artist. I am a motivational speaker. I am a community activist. I have books and CDs. I have blogs and a website and products and materials that I have created that represent my talent and I believe provide a service that is relevant and much needed today. I have done television and radio and theater and have performed across the country for much longer than I have been cutting hair. I speak life. I believe in the power of affirmation and positivity and my gifts and talents reflect that. One of my few regrets in life is that I have unsuccessfully not been able to merge these two lives of mine. Those who know me as SEE the Poet, don’t really know me as C, the barber and vice-versa. I have no grand reason for this other than that I believe that I was not able to do both successfully due to my ambitious expectations and desire. You have to dedicate time to becoming a “best” at anything and I have not been able to give my “all” because my time has been split between the things I loved and wanted and the things I thought or was told that I “needed” to do. I was told to be practical and I took that as a sentiment that maybe I wasn’t good enough or maybe I was not ready or maybe … Well I’ve made so many reasons and excuses as to why I “couldn’t” or why I “shouldn’t” do this or try “that”. I must try now. I must do now. I must go now.

Well, there aren’t many details that I can give you guys because I don’t have any. This is my faith step. This is my faith jump! I didn’t plan this date and I didn’t save for it or have a backup plan in place. I just know what my heart is telling me, has been telling me, to do. I have to follow my heart. I have to follow my mind. I’ve been in this season of the “process” for a very long time and I feel like it is time to step out. I haven’t been able to sleep or eat or think properly over the past few months, knowing that it was time to move on, time to go, but I didn’t. I feel like a hypocrite while telling others to step out, believe, trust, or go, and I haven’t. I must be an example, not just an expression and ACTION SAYS IT ALL!

So again, THANK YOU. I believe in you. I hope, wish, and pray the best for you. I look forward to being able to share my progress with you. My number and email and information will remain the same. I will be available for communication and as always, encouragement and motivation, and inspiration. As I begin to do more I will definitely post that info on my site or blogs. My products will be available on my site, . My blog is . My numbers won’t change. I really want you to know that I appreciate you and I hope that I added value to your life or made you feel good or even just gave you a great haircut. I pray that you understand that if this caught you by surprise, you know that I had no intention or alternate way to make this step without “just doing it”. If I was ever more than just the person who cut your hair, as I expect that I was, I am confident that you support this decision. If you need me to recommend a barber that can take over servicing you, I will do that for you. Now I must go. I must do. I must be.

Thank you for the time we shared. I am so excited about what comes next, I hope to share that time with you as well!


YOU have changed! (Someone is not happy)

What YOU are really dealing with is someone that wants to do what they want to do. There is no guesswork required. It’s not some big difficult puzzle to figure out. It’s not an unanswered prayer. It ain’t the devil. It’s not YOU. It is definitely not YOU! It’s not wrong “timing” or some “complicated” thing. It’s not that YOU are not enough. It’s just them. It’s just that they want to do what they want to do. It has to do with their selfishness, and/or immaturity, and/or irresponsibility, and/or their situation that has nothing to do with YOU. They want what they want and it’s not that what they want excludes YOU, no, they want what they want AND IT INCLUDES YOU! So they are going to continue to be insensitive and immature and evasive and distant and whatever else that YOU allow YOURSELF to be a part of.

The truth is that YOU probably know that. YOU probably expected them to change. YOU probably anticipated change. YOU wanted change. YOU thought that YOU were enough or more than enough to get them to change.

No, YOU can’t change “them”. Not like it is. Not the way it has been going. Not feeling like this. It has been plenty of opportunity and time to change, but they’ve resisted. They have fought it. They have fought YOU. They’ve avoided change and ignored YOU. And the fact is that out of and after all of this, the only thing that has changed… is YOU.

And they don’t like that either.


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Today’s -see 1/23/2014

YOU should be different.

Do YOU want it to be different? Then be different. It starts with a different thought. Next will be a different course of action. Thus some different habits and routines. Start going to some different places. Have a different attitude. Speak some different words. Listen to some different music. Experience some different fun. Go to a different church. Watch something different on tv. Definitely going to require some different friends. Wear some different clothes. Travel to a different city and observe some different people. Try something that YOU have never done.

Then repeat, the same things.


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Today’s -see 1/22/2014

If YOU are going to make it,
YOU are going to make it happen.

The chance YOU will.

As a matter of perspective, YOU are the worse thing that ever happened to YOU. YOU are the problem that YOU cannot seem to solve. YOU are the itching annoyance that keeps aggravating YOU to the point of extreme discomfort. YOU are the issue. YOU are the trouble. YOU are the reason that YOU are where YOU are right now. YOU are the reason that YOU are not whatever it is YOU know or believe YOU should be, or could be, or would be. YOU are the limitation, the obstacle, and the thing that YOU are physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, or psychologically inept to get through. And It is all YOUR fault.

Yes, YOUR fault. But YOU know how and who can fix it…

So, I have an exercise for YOU to do:

1. Get 2 sheets of white paper, no lines, to write on.
2. Make sure YOU that have a pen or pencil.
3. Take the first sheet & draw a small circle in the middle of the page. (In terms of the size of this circle, draw it about the size of a dime.)
4. (With a bullseye image in mind) Draw at least 9 more outer rings outward from the initial circle.
5. In the middle of the first circle, write the number (1).
6. Accordingly, in each outer ring (In succession) write the numbers 2 thru 10.
7. Now if YOU have the room, for more effect I would like YOU to be able to write the next part in these same circles or YOU could use the 2nd sheet.
8. If YOU use the second sheet, number the second page from 1-10 and in order, from YOUR perspective of importance, write the ten (10) most important things to YOU with the bullseye (center) being most important. (Example: Kids, Family, Church, Job, Friends, Cars, Hobbies, Charity, etc., WHATEVER YOU determine these ten (10) things to be and include YOURSELF in the diagram. For “YOU”, use the word “Me”) If YOU used only the 1 sheet, write these things in the rings. Now put down the pencil/pen.

Now before we continue, I want YOU to look at this “chart”. This is YOUR life. And just for the sake of the assignment I don’t want YOU to adjust anything right now. Let’s just go with this being it. And YOU have prioritized it as YOU have.

9. Pick up the pencil or pen. (This pencil now represents what and how life just “happens”.)
10. From the outer circles, from number 10, start crossing out the items on the list. This crossing out represents life, represents tragedy, represents bankruptcy, represents loss, represents trouble, hurt, harm, and danger. This is the random and spontaneous nature of life so this also represents death and destruction and disappointment.

Okay, I didn’t put example charts or images here because I didn’t want YOU reading ahead and not getting the effect of this exercise.

Normally, when I use this exercise for my audiences, around 90% of the people have charts that are pretty much this:

1. God
2. Kids
3. Job/Career
4. Me
5. Church
6. Friends
7. Giving/Charity
8. Hobbies
9. Material Possessions
10. Traveling

There are all kinds of variations and different items but the general consensus is usually like the above.

Using the 10 items that are on this list, I will explain the point of this exercise…

So there is this tragedy, this storm and it takes away #10. And then sometime after that there’s this thing that happened and well it took away the ability or access to #8 or #8 and #9. And there was this season of YOUR life and it caused great pain, or chaos, or tragedy and well it destroyed #7. And #6 was lost somewhere along the way. #5 YOU outgrew it or it outgrew YOU. And #4 was destroyed in a fire. #3 got to a point where it no longer made sense and was no longer feasible and/or YOU lost it. And…


How did we get to a #3 if #4 was “destroyed in a fire”? If YOU died how did the things most important to YOU survive? The things that rely on YOU? The things that need YOU to survive?

Now I know there is someone that will say that these things could survive after YOU. Yes that is true. But what if #4 wasn’t destroyed in a fire, what if #3 was or #2 was or #1 was? What would YOU do then?

I hope that YOU understand this.

Here is a version of my “list”…

1. Me
2. My child/children
3. My faith
4. My purpose
5. My job
6. My family
7. My friends
8. My reputation
9. My dreams/goals
10. My “fun”

This is an actual list that I did a few years ago. I had been using the “priority” circle in my speaking engagements off and on but I hadn’t normally done one for myself. So at one event, in North Carolina, I made my own and that’s what I wrote.

Now, using ME as an example…

So tragedy strikes and takes away my #10. And then sometime after that there’s this thing that happened and well it took away MY ability or access to #8 or #8 and #9. And there was this season of MY life and it caused great pain, or chaos, or tragedy and well it destroyed #7. And #6 was lost somewhere along the way. #5 I outgrew it or it outgrew ME. And #4 was destroyed in a fire. #3 got to a point where it no longer made sense and was no longer feasible and/or I lost it. And …

Well my list gets to keep going. And if everything for some or a multitude of unfortunate reasons or happenings, does go or leave or get taken away, at the center is me and guess what, I GET TO START OVER! I get to fight on! Because the truth is that I am here and I have to live. Things are going to happen. Things will be lost and suffered, yet I still have to live.

If YOU are going to make it,
YOU are going to make it happen.

YOU have to live…

Many people have taken offense to my theory based on their belief or trust in God. Their argument has been that God must be the center and so on. I fully understand the concept of that thinking. Yes, I get it. In the context of civilization and creation, God is definitely the center of the bullseye but I never asked anyone to fill out “God’s” chart. The chart I requested was YOURS. And no matter how YOU want to disagree or debate, in order to make God the “head” of YOUR life, YOU have to make that decision. That decision making power is YOURS. That makes YOU the one in control of that decision. In effect, this would be what “free will” is. So yes, YOU get to make GOD the most important thing to YOU. But understand the order, YOU did that. YOU have the power to make that choice. So, YOU should be the most important thing to YOU in order for YOU to make anyone or anything important to YOU. This isn’t selfish, it’s self-image. YOU have to be conscious and aware of who YOU are and that YOU are and that YOU are here (alive, created by God, because YOU are important). God made Himself the most important thing (center) in his circle so that YOU could be the most important thing (center) in YOURS! (I’ll let YOU marinate on that)

So the most important person in YOUR life, the one responsible for YOU, the one who is charged with YOUR well being, the one that is sure to satisfy YOUR search for Safety, Security, and Significance is… YOU!

YOU will become because of YOU. YOU will succeed because of YOU. YOU will find peace because of YOU. YOU will experience, have, do, go, be, make, find, live, explore, and everything else, BECAUSE OF YOU. YOU will get help because YOU needed it or asked for it or were in the place or position to be helped. YOU matter, YOU mean something, and because of that YOU are relevant and can and will be involved and participate in life and thus YOU get to benefit from the abundance of life that there is. YOU get to make whatever YOU feel passionate for or concern for or care about or feelings for, important. And YOU get to try. Again and again and again, because YOUR death is the only thing that can stop YOUR life!

And there is a great chance that YOU will…

YOU will most of YOUR experiences and energies into YOUR life by YOUR thoughts, feelings, words, and actions. As the proverb says, “Life and death are in the power of the tongue…” Although the happenstance or circumstance of YOUR environment, community, culture, family, and surroundings are definitely subject and suspect to the nature of order that happens, life, the truth is that YOU have a say. In whatever YOUR current position is, YOU have a say, and an action that YOU can take to better the moment for YOU. To more effectively and efficiently honor and respect YOUR God and YOUR children and YOUR family. To better appreciate YOUR “things” and YOUR abilities and YOUR truth. Because YOU honor and respect and love and trust and communicate and forgive and believe, YOU, YOU will be able to recognize and receive what any and every thing outside of YOURSELF means to YOU.

And YOU will make it happen. Whatever it is. Because of chance. Because YOU “will” the chance. Because YOU take the chance. Because of YOU!


©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Today’s -see 1/21/2014

YOU don’t have to be;
They “think” YOU are.

The “Perceived” threat.

YOU just want what is YOURS. YOU just want what is due YOU because of YOUR hard work and effort and skill and talent. YOU want what YOU have earned and should be able to have because YOU went after it, because YOU deserve it. YOU don’t have YOUR eyes on anything other than that. YOU don’t see anyone as competition or as an obstacle because YOU know that no one can take what is rightfully YOURS! YOU don’t have an agenda or motive to outshine others or steal spotlights or popularity. YOU do YOU. YOU want what is best for YOU. YOU have wants and needs and circumstances and situations that YOU are dealing with and YOU don’t have the time nor the energy to waste “hating” on someone else or trying to get what they have because YOU have work to do to get the things that YOU need to get for YOU. The fact that YOU make it “look” easy or good while YOU do does not mean that is easy, or that everything is “good”, by no stretch of the imagination. YOU just are who YOU are and some things are just YOUR “thing”.

But “they”, don’t see it like that.

What is so much more worse and damming than a threat is a “perceived” threat. The imagination of a possible danger. An expected unimaginable. A perception. A guess. A fear. The threat of what one has imagined for no reason other than imagination. Because a perceived threat was easy to accomplish. Because a perceived threat is silent. A perceived threat is volatile. A perceived threat is sensitive. A perceived threat is suspect to delusion. A perceived threat has no aim, no filter, no basis. This makes it all the more dangerous.

Are YOU the “perceived” threat?

If I were to issue a threat to YOU, whatever the threat was or promised to achieve, and YOU knew that it was me that had threatened YOU, even if YOU had no knowledge of why or when or where, YOU would still be able to protect or prepare YOURSELF for the possibility of impending danger or harm. And threats, by definition, are very successful in their ability to fulfill the meaning of their definition. Whatever the threat is, because of it action is taken or changes or adjustments are made. A threat to my survival is accordingly addressed and eliminated for the surety of my survival. Whatever the threat or harm is towards me, if I am aware of it or made aware of it, I will handle it or I will make attempt to handle it. That’s how YOU deal with threats.

But then there are the people who “perceive” YOU or YOUR gift or YOUR talent or YOUR skills or YOUR attitude or YOUR accomplishment or YOUR “potential” or YOUR personality or whatever it is, even the smallest of things, to be a threat.

And YOU have no idea how bad this can be.

Tupac, in the song “Smile” has this line I always think about where he says, “…You black, you ain’t got nothin’ to be worried about…”

Actually, YOU do.

There are people who just think that YOU are going to “out-YOU” them. Not “out-them” them, not just outdo them, but “out-YOU” them. Because YOU have something they want and YOU seem to have so much of it that YOU are going to inevitably want more of it, like ALL of it, and there will be none left for them. And YOU seem to be the favored, or chosen, or special, or popular, one. YOU seem to just always find a way to be or do or have or get. And people tend or seem to like YOU or if people don’t, it doesn’t seem to affect YOU. YOU have this resilience, this courage, this discipline, this attitude, this work ethic, this “thing”. And YOU act like YOU don’t know what is but YOU radiate it. YOU flaunt it. YOU have the audacity to act like anyone or everyone could do what YOU do. And YOU do YOU despite limitations or warnings or obstacles. And YOU SPEAK LIFE into YOUR dreams and goals and plans. And YOU show up and YOU show out! And YOU have the nerve to be humbled, but not mute, just humbled. And YOU say that YOU are going to the top.

And they believe YOU…

And so people YOU thought had YOUR back begin to question YOUR motives. Family, friends, associates, in no particular order or at any prompting, just randomly start acting “funny”. And YOU don’t just sense resistance, YOU get resistance. YOU get hate. YOU get jealousy. YOU get talked about. YOU get left. YOU get looked over. YOU get ignored. YOU get avoided.

But YOU are still the same YOU…

And YOU start hearing that someone who knows just a little about YOU seems to be spreading a lot of information about YOU. And there are these attacks on YOUR character or YOUR decision making and of course YOUR mistakes. And we have all made mistakes. YOU know that YOU have and YOU know that they have but they highlight YOURS. They condemn YOU for YOURS. They eliminate YOU from certain considerations because of YOURS. Because they “believed” (perceived) YOU to be a threat…


Whether YOU do or whether YOU don’t, someone is not going to be happy. Someone is going to feel left out or looked over. Someone is going to feel like YOU took something that was theirs or that they could have done a better job than YOU did or are doing. Whether YOU succeed or fail, there will be a chorus of people judging and criticizing YOU for something or another. And yes misery enjoys company. So YOU will definitely be the resounding subject and topic of many discussions of people who actually do know YOU and about YOU and have information that they will attempt to use to discredit, demean, delay, and/or distract YOU. They will have platforms and podiums to do this. And there is nothing YOU can do about that. Because YOU are a threat to them. YOU are a threat to their futility. YOU are a threat to their excuses. YOU are a threat to their laziness. YOU are threat to their mediocrity. YOU are a threat to their comfort. YOU are a threat to their belief that they can not do the same thing that YOU are doing. YOU are a threat to their worst fear…

That YOU are exactly who YOU said YOU are. And where they believed that YOU just got the spot YOU are in, well, because of them, because they are going out of their way to hold YOU back, to hate on you, to try to stop YOU, YOU are going to do more, dream bigger, fight harder, and consistently, persistently, relentlessly. Until YOU get what YOU deserve. What they want. What they are afraid of…



©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers