Monthly Archives: November 2014

A waiting… [POEM]

she’s waiting
been dating desperate
preparing for respite
looking for protection,
investment
she has acquired wealth
treasure
waiting for
a chance to divest it

waiting
she finds them interesting
they’ve only been interested
no interests in
just prospective
from her perspective

all risk, no reward
not even for the moment
she’s not their type
only what they’ve wanted
when they wanted
and the market trends
don’t suit her taste
so she’s wasted more energy
than should be afforded
renewable sources
courted
dangers,
thwarted
crisis,
averted

waiting
no profit from
just pockets of pain
filled to a brim
distributed amongst friends,
dividends
quarterly
from stocks she speculated
bottomed out
she did again

this has been a crash course
in value
and how not to
and what not to bet on
and why not to let on
that you’re eager
to spend
every and any thing
to end
the poverty of pleasure
so you study sectors
and technologies
through extensive research,
mostly apologies
only to end up here

covered
under a mound of past due
counting amounts
that have passed you
and time
that seems to harass you,
laughing

she asks no unreasonable question
only if he is ready
to be practical
to materialize
what is actual
and to acknowledge her
when it is time to

waiting

no agreement
is mutual distraction
and she won’t get up
if she doesn’t have to
fractions
are non-factor
she’s already halved

basked in the over indulgence
observed the opulence
and the bulges
and the focus
never came into view

no manifestation,
no use

so she asks to be allowed
to move
forward
toward a different industry
into a new science,
spiritual chemistry
alignment
not anything
out of context
there is no contest
if all there is
is conflict
of the very interest
that attempts to
compliment
or just comment

she doesn’t need the comet
just a star
one intergalactic being
on a cosmic path
specifically for her comfort
to where she is
for here
from afar

and she will pay the cost
forget the things she’s remembered
for
what she’d lost
buy into this new beginning
and cross
into the penthouse
or the loft
aloft
for as long as he will work
she will work with him
and he can be boss

she’s had it hard
but she can be soft

and they can be off,

and lying in this bed together,
forever
in the midst of it all
and lost,

waiting.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Advertisements

Family… [POEM]

family
means everything

presence
is far more relevant
than paternity

being alone
answers more to being there
than it does to perception
or notion,
preconceived
or mostly
or for the most part

while blood
doesn’t mean bond
and strangers tend to notice
who you are
in crowds

relationships are formed,
not passed down

heavy is the crown
who wears loyalty
and support
and understanding
without force,
by choice
and comes to aid
and stays
beyond the joy
or the pretty
or the idea of

titles mean nothing
unless they do
intention means nothing
unless they do
people mean nothing,
unless they do

family
is what you call
those who relate
and those who care
and those who try to
those who share
regardless
without relent
but with intent
without reservation
or dissent
with reckless abandon
and character,
integrity
and intense
those who share
and go the distance,
no matter the distance

belonging
is a consideration
often missed

people come into your life
to replace those who left
or never showed up
or that you never met
or those you’d rather forget
because their love was not
neither real, nor recognized
unrequited, with no regrets
forced, with no reflex,

reflect

family
is the life you choose
the love you choose
the type, you choose
not by default
but by decision
that you choose
to put up with
to put up with you

need is subjective
and not always met
want, is something else

choose wisely

family
means everything
titles and roles don’t
family will
titles and roles, won’t
family will prove itself
titles and roles, can’t

choose wisely

family means more
than gathering
or having
or lineage
or anything outside of being,

those who choose you
know exactly
how to be,
Family.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Lesson… [POEM]

Bring your weapon

it’s open season
for no reason other
than killing brothers
stealing mothers babies lately
no under covers
plain clothes pedestrian:
detected
uniformed officer:
suspected
rights and entitlements:
perspective
fear for one’s safety:
respected
“Hands Up, Don’t Shoot”,
neglected

Possible armed suspect
in park
fire on sight
then put the car
in park
America don’t like its colors
in dark
rather rainbows and grays
in spark
work it hun-ty
it’s art

Wallets
are weapons
Phones
are weapons
Hoodies
are weapons
Toys
are weapons
Hairstyles
are weapons
Time of day
is a weapon
Walking in the street
is a weapon
Sitting in the car
is a weapon
Hanging out with friends
is a weapon
Selling loose cigarettes,
supposedly,
is a weapon

Except
we ain’t got the weapons,
threatened

Lessons

Beat cops beat
Rookies shoot first
Sworn to protect protect themselves
Not guilty needs proof first

Lessons

How I talk
is a weapon
How I walk
is a weapon
How I act
is a weapon
How I think
is a weapon
How I feel
is a weapon
How I believe
is a weapon

Lessons

Sons get taught compliance
quicker than confidence
and that is where
the problem is

Word like weapon
Words like weapons

Lessons

Guns and Butter,
we ain’t got neither
we got mack and cheese,
they don’t believe us

Lessons

Nobody but us does the thing they complain about
so as it relates to how some people feel about us, I feel the same about it
but what can I change about it…

because we’re comfortable
so we do what they want us to
and complain about it
but nothing changes about it
and there is nothing strange about it
just take what you can get
and sang about it
You sure can sang about it!
some kind of range about it
talent like that can get you somewhere,
put a stage around it
you outta be in pictures,
put a frame around it
get you some fame around it
cost you blood, sweat, and tears
don’t leave them stains around it
You’d better clean up your act
or get a cage around it
pray to get out of the box,
sprinkle sage around it
speak no rage about it
or silenced will be your speech
just think the same about it
don’t you dare try to be different
play the game about it
say the name around it
see what came about it…

Lessons

uncomfortable
with what we have to do
till we have what we due
but until then
we’ll have to

Lessen.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Give… [POEM]

Satisfying you satisfies me
that’s what sacrifice means
so I sacrifice things,
deliberately
deny myself the urge
to act so selfish,
continuously

until I,
Give

but I am still learning
so please be patient,
effortlessly
but continue to push,
definitely…

let me,
Give

I don’t know how to say it
so I try to hide the feeling
I run away from the moment,
concealing

just…

leaving hints
and context clues
and notes on the mirror
affixed to a bruise
fighting myself to sleep,
confused
not understanding time,
I want it to myself
I want to spend it with you…

so,
Give…

Past hurts are great excuses
for being useless
dreams are used less
hopes are used more
reasons are the reasons
that seasons are all used up,
but, what are they used for?

to,
Give

winter romances
spring into
summer times
then fall,
over and over and over
again,
All…

given,

I see the mornings
warnings of expectation
the night before
was an ornament
hung in waiting
now,
just a moment distinct
something for us all,
a celebration

of,
Giving

faced with an aftermath
of impulse
but
planned out,

What happens after that?
Or, what do I have left?

I’m trying to decide
if a memory is worth the pain
that your absence provides
or if this excitement
will ever,
subside
or if obedience
feels any better
than what I feel is right,
like my sacrifice

So I will,
Give.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Little Black Boys… [POEM]

Little black boys,
ready to die for BDK
Little black boys,
ready to die for being gay
Little black boys,
“ready to die” is what they say
Little black boys,
born D.O.A

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Rainy days… [POEM]

Healing is
all that healing knows how to do
and all that is
is all that healing knows how to prove
that rainy days
hide tears
and drown out the sound
of fears
the ones that whisper memories
and then become the enemy
of emptiness
a hope that forgetting it happens
faster than remembering
and answering
to the voice of familiar
while you try to build up resistance
to doing stupid things
like yesterday
for good reason
or for comfort
for someone else
who needs help
but is too selfish
to notice you sitting there
in the rain
sitting there
in the pain
for them,
by yourself
or just to say
seeing to it that needs
and wants
and feelings,
are felt
you’ve become their rainy day
wiping the dirt away
cleansing the space
keeping them inside,
and safe
falling down uncontrollably
noticeably,
but they are not noticing
you being like raindrops
giving chase
and wet
whenever they need you
to be
whatever
or anything
living water,
replenishing
or set
a puddle that they play in
or walk around
or avoid all together
you rain,
like weather
one could expect

Rainy days
bring a new
being anew
someone that recognizes
what it is like being rain,
being a you
and in a moment
a temperature change
brings to view
that rainy days
are the best days
for remembering that
there is never a regret
in being so true

because the rain
is healing
and healing is
all that healing knows how to do.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Move… [POEM]

awaken to arise
sunrise of surprise,
MOVE

inspired to intention
devoid of dissension,
MOVE

passionate to purpose
compassionate of courage,
MOVE

favor to faith
patience of pace,
MOVE

mirror to morrow
survivor of sorrow,
MOVE

want to will
suffer to still,
MOVE

motivated to matter
appreciative of after,
MOVE

goal to greatness
shadow of statements,
MOVE

right to reason
bastion of believing,
MOVE

living to love
abundance of above,
MOVE

potential to possible
oblivious of obstacles,
MOVE

never to now
world of wow,
MOVE.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Today will be… [POEM]

Today will be different
so I imagine it isn’t
the tomorrow from yesterday
where I had felt so much pain

Today will be possible
because I fought through the obstacles
and opened my mouth
at least to say,
“Change”

Today will be better
and I won’t let her suffer
the remnants will be nothing
I’m suggesting something other,
than the same

Today will be right
because I will fight for it
go in a different direction,
like forward

Today will be plentiful
I will settle for nothing less
than what I like towards
the way I want for myself

Today will be important
according to my expectation
suited to my taste
affording me the patience

Today will be recognized
to suddenly be anew
in the face of what was old
to such a better view

Today will be special
regardless of issues,
I never surrendered
no matter what I’ve been through

Today will be cherished
each moment and minute,
my beginning till the end
from my awake to my finish.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Bruh… [POEM]

Where are we?
Where do we stand?
Who amongst is for us?
Do we know we can?

Bruh,

I believe in you
I believe you
I’m proud of you,
Just know…

I see you
I’m supporting you
I will follow you,
Just go!

I’m here
I’m available
You can trust me,
Indeed

Don’t be shy
Don’t think you’re crazy
Don’t be ashamed,
Just breathe

No pressure,
No stresses
No problem
too much

You can do it
It can be done
You need to,
just once

Bruh,

There is a world without our best interest at heart
and somehow we let that world tear us apart
Systems and societies that were built on our strength
took advantage of our loyalty,
then sold us on myths…

You are no less capable or able to do
Your manhood is worthy, and it should be worth it to you
Your dreams, Your goals, Your hopes, all valid
You deserve to be recognized, YOU are YOUR talent

Statistics and stereotypes,
assumptions and lies
There is a plan to destroy us,
with schemes to divide
The messages, the images,
the perceptions, the news
These things are deliberately intended for you

Bruh,

There was a history before the history they gave us
There is a history where they hadn’t enslaved us
There is a history of brotherhood and common belief
There is a history of rich tradition and culture,
men who looked like you and me

There is no reason for us to hate one another
You can believe in yourself and still support my dream
You don’t have to take one or the other

No God said that we had to be the same
but a devil would have you believe such a thing
You are entitled to your feelings, opinions, and quirks
Bruh, I understand
for you, that is what works
But we’ve been divided and conquered on an idea that we must
or that our color is somehow a shade of distrust
they say we’re crabs in a bucket, or animals encaged
but placed in buckets or cages, what should we display?

Fighting is not first nature or course for our kind
The savage we portray is based on the times
Violence and hatred, confusion and lack
That is not us family, none of that is black

The jealousy, lies, deceit, despair
all learned behaviors outside of who we are,
We inherently care

We love our women, our children are pride
Don’t let this world persuade you different,
I know you want to provide

Being forced to fit where it is not possible,
The plan has long been to subject you to ridiculous obstacle

Back to the wall,
feet to the fire
We were taught lessons that won’t get us hired!

And then asked to blend where we are innately bold
labeled outcast, overbearing, obnoxious
or so we are told

Our style, our flair, the way we speak
What makes us different is what made them cheat

But we are copied, examined, studied, and shown
Do not settle for someone else’s idea of who you are,
Your greatness is known

You have every right to who you are,

I believe in you
I believe you
I’m proud of you,
Just know…

I see you
I’m supporting you
I will follow you,
Just go!

I’m here
I’m available
You can trust me,
Indeed

Don’t be shy
Don’t think you’re crazy
Don’t be ashamed,
Just breathe

No pressure,
No stresses
No problem
too much

You can do it
It can be done
You need to,
just once.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

sick… [POEM]

There is a pillow that carried your head last night,
we are going to fight
I’m coming for the sheets and covers that held you,
it’s just not right

Didn’t I tell you,
No one but me
I’m jealous of the mirror that stares into your eyes every morning
I envy that cup of tea,
because it kissed your lips,
before me

I’m sick

How dare that shower water run itself up and down you like that?
What about my fingers?
I’m going to hide the towel that got to dry you off,
I’m stingy

I loathe the music you listened to,
I want to be the something you pay attention to
The way the phone dances around your ear,
I want to be that near
Why is your window wide open?
I want to be that clear

I know, I’m sick

I see the way those clothes are hanging on to you
and I don’t like it one bit
What am I supposed to do?
You got me like this

I’m sick

Paranoid that your imagination is on your mind more than I am,
Why are those shoes carrying you around everywhere you go?
I can

That perfume is flirting with your neck,
That jewelry is smothering you
I get so enraged having to acknowledge how close you and your underwear are,
but what am I supposed to do?
Those panties have no business in your business,
That bra can’t taste a thing
Your nightgown can’t hold a candle to the way I can satisfy you,
Why waste a dream?

Okay, I’m sick

I’ll be every friend you needed
Every shoulder, every hand
No one needs to give you anything
I’ll surrender every coin,
supply every chance
You will never, Baby,
never be lonely
You will never be alone
The sick you make me feel feels so right,
If being well is being without you, then I’d rather be wrong

The point is that you make me better
and all the world is right when we are good
I know you have to breathe without me
but if I could do it for you,
I would

I’m sick,
we both can tell
but it doesn’t have to be like this,
You can make me well.

-see

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet