Monthly Archives: September 2015

as with, everything…   [POEM]

trading loose ends
for paper trails
affairs for marriage
free-spirited opulence
for fairytales
whimsical folly
for wedding bells

I hear footsteps
down the hall
of how I remember
peace

bartering peace of mind
for a piece of hers
putting together such a life
from just pleasing words
denying a teasing urge
or defying a fleeing bird
by way of still

I can still hear
still remember well
almost see the difference,
still can
tell

surrendering unknowns
knowingly
for habits, routines,
and clarity
selfish ways
for sharing things
or remain by myself

I keep on hearing
the background noise
despite the beautiful random
of consistents’ poise
by choice…

as with, everything.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

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Never-Min(e)d…   [POEM]

I ain’t beggin’ fo no lovin’
won’t be worried fo no woman
I ain’t gon’ tend to no tender
and don’t be gettin’ back a sumpthin’

sure as is was to other
there will be another
one sure as eva to be bitter,
had I did or done nothin

but won’t catch me a fussin
or doing that much a cussin
I’ll faster be along on my way,
than fisticuffs, or much discussion

I ain’t for the bluffin
don’t be calling me no muffin
I can take well care of myself,
don’t matter how well or warm her stuffin’

it won’t be me a cuffin’
ole boy doin much more a puffin’
ain’t been sick ’bout no humpin
since you could clear a fools flu with ‘tussin

so, I ain’t beggin’ fo no lovin’
won’t be worried fo no woman
I ain’t gon’ tend to no tender
and don’t be gettin’ back a sumpthin’.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Patter…  [POEM]

your energy
is bleeding
seeping through the cracks
of my concrete heart
and starting
to rupture me
beginning to break apart
the hardened cadence
of my pain
taking away
my darkened spark,
saving me…

I can feel you
healing me,
again, a-gain, a gain
a balanced arrhythmia
after now
no pain,
plain
but how can it seem
you did it so easily
a turbulent chaotic
calmed me speedily
as if the silent of so long
had chosen to speak to me,
saying, “just believe”
and, “in me”…
repeatedly

your energy
determined that I was
worthy,
immediately
and such began the process
of recovery
from no such
to such a thing
and now a beat
steadily
and I made it,
wondering.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Over, Being… [POEM]

there are sounds
loud noises
screams
provoking thought
profound voices,
and dreams

being heard
being seen
as means
and reason to be

there are deceivers
wanters
users
abusing the privilege
taking advantage,
scheming

being loved
being cared for
defended
and taken seriously

there are moments
instances
times
allowing for
and creating
hope

being lived
being enjoyed
purposefully,
and deemed

there are lies
mistruths
fairytales
appearing as real
believed
causing things

spoken
chosen
gratuitously,
over being.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

I can’t tell… [POEM]

I don’t know
and I can’t tell,
whether you are
a muse to me
or just amuse me
acclimated to pain
or just accusing
I find the privilege,
rather abusing
you’re choosing
well within your right
but the left you are
is losing me
bruising to thee ego,
it is a pride thing,
as much as we know
but I can’t tell
can’t smell the aroma any longer
but what scent is present,
couldn’t get any stronger
a serving of plenty,
I’d rather live with hunger,
you’re too full for me
I could pretend to be satisfied,
or just wait until you empty
and stock up on groceries 
and then my simple menu
will again be tempting
or enough for a spell,
but I can’t tell.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Ending with ly’s (lies)…

he loves her, religious
she loves, routine
both perpetually
both present and sure,
yet both, skeptically

or so it seems

he knows this, now
she understands, in circumstance
but both know the truth
and by chance, typically

he goes about the way, unfazed
she comes and goes, in doubt
both recognizing one another
loving along the way, in route
historically

he sees no end in sight
she sees no other way to be
both see this as necessary,
a requirement for them to believe,
appropriately

he doubts that she ever will
she has doubt in him, never still
they belong in the way they are
hurt, with a hope to heal

he longs to touch her,
she hopes to feel,
hypothetically.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

stages…   [POEM]

I’ve seen ’em change for change
and get strange for strangers
and I’m just like, “dang”,
I only wanted to keep you out of danger
but you thought what I had was anger
thought my aim was an angle
funny to see you front on me,
I’ve had your back for ages
whether we played on rocks or stages
no script, we got time
that you don’t block for pages,
nor should you have clocked
for wages
but you chose locks, and cages
and we can’t be free no more
you don’t rock with me no more,
because I don’t flock for rages
I’m still from the block,
but I move un-stopped, courageous
you let a little noise go to your head,
guess you cold now,
hope what you’ve got is not contagious
or that you can stop,
or contain it…

Old friends got new on you
made moves,
but returned out the blue on you
you don’t even know the way made for you to get it how you got it,
how I been taking the sh*t
they threw on you
even the ones you think don’t think your sh*t stink
got diarrhea,
they throwing so much number two on you
but I’m on they a**,
let one of ’em get out of hand
or put a boo-boo on you
I’m going full in,
acting like a boo on you,
going to protect your every step,
like I’m the boot on you

You still don’t get it
but them lights on
and your crowd is waiting
I know you’ve always wanted your turn,
we ain’t gone let your candle burn,
debating
so it’s your turn, take it
make the most of it
bread on the table,
I hope you get most of it
this your party,
you better be the host of it
don’t let me stop the music,
or haunt you in anyway,
matter of fact, the past is the past,
I’ll just be the ghost of it
mention me like a memory,
I’ll send you a bottle,
for the toast of it
round of drinks of me,
but I bet they drink the most of it

You’re right, everybody don’t go
just remember this though,
I got the information
that everybody don’t know
and I’m going to be here forever
when they rocking with you
or when they don’t show
some of us happen to “make it”,
some of us make it happen,
so
either way, we all got a way to go,
we just got away,
or got to wait
to know.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

inner thought… [POEM]

last night
felt like tomorrow should
if only tomorrow could
so that the sorrow would,
go astray
but somewhere we made up
without making the problem
go away
and I woke up believing in you
as if the dirt had just blown away
empty trash, and a clean slate
how could a burden be so easy
to throw away
why wouldn’t you just leave me?
at least be bold and say…
“I did it”,
and at least try to admit it
then give me time to hate you
and not act like what is so new
is old today
excuses growing old per say
over-analyzing is how I use my soul to pray
I feel so old & gray
cold as slate
in a golden way…
holding space
unwilling to allow myself
to move on from you,
even after having been
told to wait…

I should listen to myself,
most often.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

running, in place… [POEM]

whether we want to decide
or choose to be able
weather permitting a storm
or a condition unstable
if we open up to be honest
or choose belief in the fable,

everything is on the table

and you deserve a label
so here you are,
stable
I offer to understand you
I give you my heart
by no means do I intend you harm,
just doing my part

you knew me from the start

terrible to hear that you’re lonely
that should never be
your amazing
should never even be alone,
you deserve company
a parade of amazing moments,
at the very least,
and that once was me

un-forgotten, completely

but today,
is why we don’t love the same
tonight,
is a reason for the game
and tomorrow,
we won’t remember the pain

because nothing will change.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

I made you a promise… [POEM]

I made you a promise,
“One year from now”
and it came true
but I was just a mess,
you were the same you
all the while I believed
that the God to my liking,
had named you
whether we made it or not,
I’d have to change rules
but I had to run away
couldn’t walk in those same shoes…
and but I would blame you
hoping you’d chase me
or at least be a sane fool

but I made the promise

and you were worth every word
“never felt so comfortable”,
something I had never heard
nor knew the meaning to,
until I finally believed in you
I took way too much time, the nerve
but that was all fear,
of a past once occurred
and you observed,
my confusion was clear to you
you believed me
and after all this time,
I know you still do

I made you a promise

could not serve you less than,
so I just ran
dare I have the audacity to speak now,
but I just am
seeing that you are not where we could be,
well, I just can
sitting in wait, via mistake
I just stand
remember your faith in me?
it wasn’t just glance
I deserve your love
it is worth chance

I made you a promise

“when are you coming back?”
you had every right to ask
but I was searching for a clarity
that I tried every night to mask
hurt people hurt people
and I perfected the task
left a wife I was sure to marry,
and a daughter I may never have
the future says it’s okay,
right now I’m stuck with a past

I made you a promise

have tried my best and all to let it go
2,017 plus days since that moment,
each second counted slow
wanting any reason to replace the feeling
but away they just won’t go
I could have kept this to myself,
but silence just ain’t so
if I won’t try, then I can’t know…

and I made you a promise

that I’d become the man I presented
that the fate of my words,
would not be prevented
that if you gave me your heart,
you would not resent it
that no interruptions
would overshadow my intentions
that we would be what I said,
because I meant it…

when I made you a promise.

-see

©2015 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet