Category Archives: Inspiration

No Regrets [POEM]

the way you loved me worked

even if the way you loved me hurt

but I’d long ago gotten used to it

after all, I’d gotten use through it

I prefer a pain that prepares me

and being ignored just scares me

so I was always going to make it

to show you that I could take it

while you’d never been challenged

for manners you had learned malice

I felt that I could reach you

felt my submission would teach you

oh, you hurt me as routine

but my wants were as you need

I surrendered pride and peace

for attention

traded self-esteem and dignity

for a mention

I am torn for your amusement

worn or warned as you choose it

you found new ways to destroy

apology used as a decoy

my body served you first and last

you never had to ask

I had to beg for reciprocity

or for you to get on top of me

to adore me in your lust

you’d just ignore me in your rush

your pleasing was to oblige me

but you’ve never been inside me

while I emptied you of desire

you just let mines expire…

but the way you loved me worked

even if the way you loved me hurt.


©2018 Cornelious “See” Flowers



On Social Media…

suffice it to say,
everyone cheats
but not everyone gets caught
just as well,
everybody is for sell
but not everyone gets bought
no man is without blame
we all are guilty at a very least
each and all are liars to some extent
silence is honor amongst the thieves
pillow talk could serve subpoena
trust will indict for blame
emotions produce the evidence
hurt will mirror just the same
the resentment of regret
is why optimism dies
facing towards the past
is for production of the cries
jealousy is how we go
hate is why we do
ego is always toxic
pride is always proof
there are no true rules of engagement
be it just necessary means
hard work humbled by a lottery
of beneficial cons and schemes
and everyone is just as ready
to pounce upon the wave
a master speak in master,
and a slave should speak in slave
electronic crowds of the foolish
photographic clouds contain the midst
no particular order of success
just whomever made the list
green lights direct the traffic
along this worldwide web
spiders of insecurity
catch their prey by walking dead
a false sense of belonging
misguided notions of a ruse
in a snap she loses dignity
bartered cheaply for some views
and to some victim comes the spoil
a rotted carcass dressed in shame
pleading guilty of being normal
or being wanted, just the same
ideas toward being different
shot down by capitalists
follow me for your instruction
is from the wisdom of assists
and share in this destruction
leave your soul and sight behind
better yet to be accepted
than to ignore these private lives
diminish your capacity
for who you were to be
he left his true ambition
for the attention of a scene
haven’t seen them since logging on
been different zombies by the day
remembered to check your timeline
but forgot to walk away
and no distinction of these victims
child and parent share alike
whose to say there should be different
if we pretend it not as why
continue scrolling down this spiral
and find yourself along the way
another mention in the graveyard
becoming ghost of hollowed way

… suffice it to say,
everyone cheats
but not everyone gets caught
just as well,
everybody is for sell
but not everyone gets bought.


©2018 Cornelious “See” Flowers

the space between words… [POEM]

there is

and rooms,
quickly filled


thoughts, intentions, ideas,
notions, reasons, excuses, lies,
confusions, wants, needs, hopes,
baggage, hurts, frustrations, desires, truths, riddles, guesses, issues, longings, potential, possibility, anger, curiosity, inconsistencies, feelings, fears, disguises, masks, problems, questions, solutions, suggestions, answers, idiosyncrasies, evidence, proof, dead-ends, paths, clarity, unknowns,


and language that
,without ever coming to conclusion,
no translation

hope and hazard
clue to what happens after
that is unsuccessful
at trying to be

but the sentences make sense
like sentiment
messages sent, meant
to lead one to assumption
whereby gumption is granted
to listen

because i haven’t heard the verb
or seen the word that moves
using action and consistency,
literally and consistently

just narrative
that barely meets the standard
of what is required
and so listening has grown tired

a complete sentence goes
the way you should have
and has the answer
that you could have
if you only knew that
you would have
been better not saying anything

lest it was your explanaction
and punctuated
with the perfect symbol
like memories or dreams tend to
unlike most now’s
that are just nouns
or presents
that aren’t really


Of. Me.
To. Require.
That. You. Deliver.

says Me, in response to the mirror
looking at empty rooms
because of doors
and too many lent out keys

the question was complicated
and the answer was please
the lock should have kept them out
but the password was need

or attention
bandaid for self-esteem
or just an option
because to have those is to win
and losing (in perception)
is a sin

even if i feel better waiting
for what i truly want
and refuse to haunt my ghosts
with lust
or greed
for similarly “finer” things

there is
t o o much s p a c e

room for doubt,
and people
that don’t deserve to be there
but are
because they are aware

wearing costumes that fit
-only the moment-
becoming permanent mistakes
and giving reason rarely
to justify even speaking

caught my self “not” everything,
but thinking
before i recognize
that it is my right
to do right
and only allow
for right to be done

or accept incomplete
ignorant to my need
that doesn’t sound right
just what is left
when the purpose was nothing other
than to waste breath.


©2018 Cornelious “See” Flowers

i could feel… [POEM]

there are reasons to love
and be made fool of
at least once
every chance you get
for the sake of a chance to say
that such is not a myth
instead more like got to be
yet for some it is everything,
and not to me
but the pain that comes in tow
is one that only death should know
yet here i am again
wishing love to be my friend
or to at least find mercy even
when alas that love is leaving
to play sport of another’s heart
and turn so my light to dark
for nothing but the thrill
of saying i could feel.


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Choke…   [POEM]

fickle as a heart can be
damned it was so usual to me
kicking about the grounds as leave
for no other reason than best if we

should you find a way home
i would absolutely go

passing time as more than such
but never ever meaning much
for what would serve a sooner try
than acting toward a living lie

after the world shows you right
come to my space the after night

rude it is of consequence
to mock the life of same
and there we were all meant to be
but too afraid to change

if you ever need to breathe
come suffocate with me.


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers

i find you… [POEM]

i find
then here i am,
lost again
searching the ways to love you
at any cost there is
i find
somewhat beyond this ordinary
a particular breed of different,
more than every
greater than, unequal to
not even amazing can equal you
and i find
beautiful above all
inside and out
from your past
to the present you are to me
this time amounts
to perfect
i find you worth it
a purpose that responds in change
so unlike my beautiful before
you reflect the same
so i find
even in my quiet
even when i am right next to you
even if i don’t try it
to fall asleep aside
staring you alive
living inside this perpetual moment
floating this sky
’till i find
by some window
waiting me to bid you near
asking for your soul in matrimony
showing my whole so clear,

because i find


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers

attempt at… [POEM]

there is an emptiness
a space left after you
a hole filled with something else’s
just something else’s,
and there is nothing left to do
but feel the void
i escaped assurance
for the sake of paranoid
more questions than your questions
i’m somewhat skeptical
so my mind offers suggestions

i should stop thinking
or start drinking
a vice would suffice
when what’s left won’t get me right
lest i repeat a cycle
practice for the recital
i bet this excites you
that i’m not so well
and you can tell

here’s this image
this unfortunate blemish
this wickedness seeming to exist
and an audacity to remiss
suppose a heart had its own way
unabated by the brain
immune of sorts to possibility
and ignorant to change
but we’d still have been the same
i, part of the problem
you, part of the game

i would do it another way
juxtaposition in accord with healing,
somewhat disdain for the result,
the whole thing could have been,

where is the redemption
does mistake qualify exemption?
maybe there was good reason
validation for an attempt
when all is well upon all is gone
i was there all along
not to leave for the sake of indelible
this thirst is almost edible
absolutely incredible
i am still here,

Where are you…


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers

oh-ver…   [POEM]

almost said i do
before i was able to
would have been a tragedy
the kind love aspires to
but could have gotten through
or at least mean to
like most
but i want you to be forever
like ghost
i lean for happiness to haunt you
like host
there to see you through
and hurt you till you heal
develop callouses to being lied to
and get over pain,
because you tried to
with no feeling
because it died to
that’s real
that’s the solution to being killed
eternal life is a skill,
applied to
and i almost went the way
of not choosing what i mean to say
standing there at an alter
indifferent to the day
making promises i hope to break
like i am present for presences sake
what time does time take
how far is time away
and how long can time wait
if you only pretend to be awake…

i almost let you leave
without forcing you to breathe
should have pushed you away
or at least made you see
that going would be best
but staying would hurt less
in the mean time we die
like wings that cannot fly.


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers

buy-polar…  [POEM]

i get to ask you questions
and i demand answers,
i deserve truth
because i love myself
now that i’ve learned to
forget that i yearn you
no hurt is worth me losing faith
the sun brings forth life
but it burns too
and i’d rather live
so i’m giving myself a right to
with or without you,
depending on how i feel
based on how you comport
even more so on what you conceal
so i’ll let you heal
fall apart without me
blame me if you need to
it doesn’t matter what i say
as long as you believe you
perception becomes reality
when you allow it to seem to.


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers

grieving process…  [POEM]

… this morning
i am mourning
moaning out your name
for a change
in sighs that sound the same

and i can tell it’s showing
like everything now
this hour says keep going
i just don’t know how
an insubordinate remembrance
keeps me toward the down
and this morning
it is so loud

like an overwhelming
telling me to wake
referring me to face my feelings
against my better sake
for the luxury of just in case
and i am still hurting
enjoying the same place

haven’t moved since Monday
more than that many years ago
but somehow stayed it present,
prolific mastery of my low
and it isn’t all your fault
but i need for you to know

that i awoke this morning
in mourning
moaning out your name.


©2017 Cornelious “See” Flowers