Tag Archives: Encouragement

Love Is… (Relationship)

There is definitely a period or season in which your relationship will be even, where it should be even. “Even” in a sense of and respect to accord and assurance and automatic access to agreement. There is a time where everything seemingly always goes together in a symbiotic unity that is all spectacular and in the space of magical amazingness.

It is supposed to be like that.

For a period, for a season.

But relationships that actually last and have depth and definition and detail and evolve into destiny aren’t “even” all the time. Not even most of the time.

There is always an issue, some challenges, some changes, disruption and delay, confusion, chaos, hurt and hell to go through. There is always a problem, a decision, a choice, an obligation and a responsibility to pick a side. There is always question and instigation and accusation and controversy. There is always mess and frustration and misery demanding to sit in your company. There are moments of lack and lethargy, discontent and so much noise.

While the work has to be done.

While the bills have to be paid.

While the home has to be kept.

While the kids have to be raised.

While the time keeps passing by.

And still, more importantly still…

The soul has to be uplifted.

The spirit has to be nourished.

The mind has to be stimulated.

The romance has to be maintained.

The peace has to kept.

Your mate has to be considered.

Love is not just love. Love is everything more than love. Love is all the things more than love. Love is sacrifice and surrender whilst satisfying self. Love is particular and specific and yet ambiguous and wide. Love is gentle and firm. Love is intelligent and understanding. Love is complete yet open, comprehensive and curious.

And relationships require the steadiness of the unknown to abide its journey into fate. Ever heard of the good fight? The good fight is a relationship. The good fight is an ever-ongoing battle for the sake of someone else. The good fight is sleepless and exhausting and turbulent and demanding and constant. It always is. There is no time or room for the expectations or ask that a relationship is anything other than that.

Those seasons of complete congruence are the ultimate reward for complying with a confrontation that is compliment of your courage and cause. That good is a direct result of how good you become in the tantrum of this dynamic. You will absolutely know the days that are fantastic by the default of what those terrible times demand of you!

You’ll find “odds” more often than not. What you will achieve good at is deciding when to debate and when to defer. Compassion and patience are outfits that should align the wardrobe of your wants. Love is tender. Love is an acute mandate that you honor and embody to stay in the way. To be available for the fight. To be present and aware to the unknown. Because you chose this and for as long as an iota of desire rest in the two of you, you are obligated to take arms and forge into the fisticuffs of faith and action.

Through it all. For as long as it takes. And that is matrimony. That is what marriage really is. That is a relationship. Arduous and audacious and ambitious and abundant and adamant.

For each one of you.

Because on both sides, bookending that “season” of total compliment is life. And life requires that differences be met with diligence and discipline. And life requires decision. You decided on a relationship.

This is what you have to do.

-see

@seethepoet

©2018 Cornelious “See” Flowers

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Thought for the Moment [#5]

I do not want to be a “career” anything. I don’t believe that to be the point of existence. I don’t imagine life to ever have been intended for one place, or one thing.

I believe I am here for the experience, the experience of love and pain, of joy and hurt, of up and down.

I want to know more, try more, do more. I want to see and feel, MORE! I want to exercise my breath given right and obligation to experience such.

I want to continue to learn. I want to examine and discover. I want my curiosity to be eternal. I want to find out and touch.

I see life, in this dimension, as a moment. A moment that requires my full attention and energy. A moment that needs my presence. A moment that wanted me to be here.

And I am. I am here. To live. As I see and feel fit. To do so in cooperation with the universe. For the purpose and plan towards good and just and fair. For the cause of what is sincerely equal and right. Not what is expected or assumed or limited. Not what is ruled or controlled by the inconsistent and volatile nature of selfish, egotistical, and rude humanity.

I believe humans to be possible. Possible of good. Possible of amazing. Possible of wonderful! I believe humans can be more. And more is not excess or overkill or obsessive; More is smarter, kinder, gentler, more peaceful, more relaxed, more satisfied, more confident, more understanding, more engaging, more open, more compassionate, more consistent…

More human, and not what we’ve become… apps and programs and versions, of the duped and directed, of the controlled and silenced, of the scared and hopeless.

That is not life to me. So I choose to live another way. I choose to live from my heart and in my present and at this time…

and this, this I can do forever.

-me

©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers
@seethepoet

Today’s -see 12/10

Don’t ever make YOUR survival or YOUR success about anyone other than YOU!
It sounds wonderful to say that you are doing what you are doing for the family, for the children, for the block, for the hood, or for whatever or whoever else you have given the power of significance in YOUR life but the truth is that if YOU aren’t okay and straight, you won’t be able to get any of “them” okay or straight!
Once you have YOU in order you can get them in order, but the bar is set with you. Love, Trust, Character, Hustle, Pride, Responsibility, Growth…, all that stuff happens for you when YOU do what YOU are supposed to do! Then you’ve earned the ability to do it “for” them!

-see

Today’s -see

We often wonder why there is no or not enough support in our corner for the issues or causes that we believe in. Attention and connection tend to waver sporadically amongst the people we may “expect” to have our best interest at heart inconsistent with what we believe our “needs” to be. That is because no one can truly fight for YOU, they can fight with YOU, they can fight YOU, but only YOU can fight YOUR battle(s)! So, FIGHT … for YOU!
-see

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Today’s -see

Be careful not to end up on the “wrong” end of something because YOU thought it “right” to listen to or follow the instruction(s) of someone who was just saying what needed to be said in order to sell a dream that YOU mistakingly brought into. If YOU want “new” opportunities and experiences, YOU will naturally and appropriately obtain “new friends”. Embrace the ability and chance of NEW that turns YOUR NOW into POSSIBILITY!
-see

FATHER’S (Emphasis on man)

This is not Happy “Take/Took care of your kids day”. With that being said this is Father’s Day, for men. To acknowledge and give appreciation to the MEN who are carrying the title and definition of Father to the level that demands and denotes the character, deserves the respect, and brings in the awareness of saluting those past and present who assumed those specific roles. No matter how you attempt, try, or masquerade the role to give “props” to anything other than a BY DEFINITION Father, it is what it is. I, myself, don’t feel as if I am the “best” I can be in my capacity as a father but I think it is a disrespect to honor the mother of my son on Father’s Day. “Mother” is that by itself. You can’t combine mother with another title because Mother means what mother does and mothers do WHATEVER IT TAKES. If that requires that a mother be the only supporting parent then that is what SHE must do. It is all that SHE can do. Father isn’t a costume or context or complex or compromise. Father is a completion that is product of a composition that is not just characterized by men, its character is a man. Father is not an idea, it is an imprint, an impression and there is no invisible “understanding” that allows for us to imply that what is not a father is a father.
Freedom of speech aside, enough is enough. We have to understand that from our “expressions” are our children’s examples and far too pervasive is the blurring and smearing of the lines that set the boundaries and build the foundations that our futures are built on. Little boys who grow up being told that mothers are “fathers too” are more prone to be willingly seduced by the ideas and perversions of influence that offer them safety, security, and significance inside the sanctity of situations and satisfactions outside of the conventions of their natural desires. It weakens the strength. It confuses the competence and structure of the premise. It breaks the hold that is necessary for the reason of being able to become more inclined to be what one is possible to be.
It is not right.
To the women who had to step up and become more than just co-parent or co-partner I salute and recognize that you did. That the situation did not co-operate with what should have been is unfortunate and all too common but it is where you have to work from. No need to bash or belittle or berate the “boy” ( I don’t know everyone’s situation and I’m probably using the term boy only to pacify the females that will read this and require a feeling of being agreed with) that YOU at one time saw fit to be good enough to be a father. (Someone is going to say that, “I never saw him as a father, it just happened) To these I say that you should refer to the reproductive chapter of sex education that talks of what happens when a penis (minus condom) enters a vagina (minus birth control). The point is: You are a mother. Period.
To my brothers, as do I, that have children that are now product of single parent households (Child/Children live with the mom/moms and are seen or heard from via mutual understandings, court orders, or whatever the case) today I have a message for us. Let us take our titles back! From now is where we can do all that we can do to make sure that no one is able to take our roles from us because there is no room to do such if we fill it ourselves. Get in contact with your children. Do what is necessary in YOUR life to make it possible for you to be in theirs. This is not as easy as it may seem I am suggesting, trust me I know but we MUST collectively individually man up to our responsibility (financially, emotionally, mentally, psychologically, and physically). If we take it upon ourselves to be there and are there for the sake of being accountable to the act then the actions from here on out will favor us. No one can take a fathers place! NO ONE! If it is a way, then find it, create it, make it, do what must be done. I understand that we live in a society governed by a system of laws that do more than suggest that we are incompetent deniers of responsibility and monsters for which remedy is severe punishment and exile. We face that and the media driven impressions and institutions that perpetuate these travesties of justice and then we have to navigate on roads that are maintained by stereotypes and statistics and spectators who find it sufficient to support the nonsense as opposed to reevaluating the psychologies and dynamics of the cultures that so suffer from such. And then you have a “baby mama” from hell or who is instructed and influenced by some friend or show or other “baby mama” or a mama (baby mama’s momma) that finds it all too easy to make it hard on you in order to maintain the relationship with a daughter or friend that was lost or in perceived limbo because of you. Yes, I understand you have to deal with all that. And the economy. And your past. And your mess. And your family. And the fact that you don’t or didn’t have a father in your life.
And you got a situation now that you want to work on and you don’t want to lose out on it because of what happened last or long ago. All of it.

Well, Father’s have to deal with all of that. That’s why this day is for them.

Happy FATHER’S Day!

©2013 Cornelious “See” Flowers

GO (… For it)

You don’t “go for it” because it goes against the normal and that means that you will have to do something different and people are going to see you differently and then they will treat you differently and probably won’t help you because they don’t quite see “it” the way that you do and in fact they are more than likely going to go out of their way to get you to maintain the “way” that they know you and that seems to feel like their against you but it’s a mixed bag because you know that most of “them” don’t know you well enough to “hate” you but their lack of support in between the moments of pacifying your ego tends to come off as offensive and demeaning and in the meantime you’ve been distracted enough by it so much so that you’re not doing what you could be when you should be and so your mouth and mindset become just momentary spokesmen for what you would be if you were to ignore the natural inclination to care so much for the opinions and suggestions of others and just do the thing you wanted to do in the first place.

There is always going to be resistance and struggle of some magnitude, obstacles and doubts, fears and rules, stereotypes and questions, and much more to bring reason or excuse as to why you “might not”, “won’t”, “shouldn’t try”, or aren’t “meant to” do something. But there is one reason you can, because you did. Because you did whatever it takes to make YOU happen. No matter who or what does something that could have stopped you had you not kept going.

Just GO!

©2013 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Awaken (Alive) [POEM]

I wonder if anyone notices
that I walked away
left
everything they said was right
for me
so that I’d sooner be
worthy
gave up my sanity
so that I may be ready
for the craziness
that came for me
when I spoke death
to the things that damaged me

they only see that I was gone
guessed and hypothesized
quite often criticized
as to my why’s
without ever asking me
suggestion that I took leave
was why I couldn’t breathe
choking on the smoke
of their trees
burned fruit only makes jam
to be put in a can
and that Sir,
that wasn’t me
labeled “all natural”
preservatives added
artificial flavors
and even coloring
readily available on aisle 3
next to the pornography
and the gambling
and the mediocrity
packages of hope and faith
tucked somewhere in between

they brought it
I brought into it
stupid investment
a return of “been through it”
now I know to check it out
then do it

salvation available
for good sayings,
and a powerful poem
some profound verbiage
and they all goin’
don’t know nothin’
’bout the All Knowing

or what I really look like
without the robe
they were satisfied talking
about the clothes
which don’t fit the occasion
let alone the man
but what garment is appropriate
when you’re chosen to stand
loose fitting true religion
or another brand
of even tighter pants

I think she noticed me
recognizing my wife in her
but she can’t handle my truth
let alone my life in her
so I’ll just be whatever she says
something on the side
another knife in hers

I wish she would have though
because I could have been had more
but no reason to
just brings him them bad lore
and I could deal with it
but what for

then I see her again last night
and I wanted to make things right
but of course she just left early
couldn’t see past sight

would’ve chased her but
that would have wasted what
I been working 3 years
to face her
once

I gave up everything
forgot almost everything
and almost remembered my past
’till a voice reminded me
that I can comeback
and this time I’ll be
better
capital letters
longer sentences
clear thoughts possible
through repentance’s

and great
maybe just a little bit late
but I can’t fall asleep anymore
a new generation to awake
for sake
my son’s and mine
both in the same boat
Alive.

©2013 Cornelious “See” Flowers

Today’s -see

Make big mistakes
and take BIGGER chances,
Occupy YOUR youth with gambles
and risks,
try failure,
Go against the grain,
despite what convention tells YOU,
Ask stupid questions,
when and where YOU get chance to
succeed at this
and YOU will find YOUR answers,
Living.
-see