There is a difference between “letting them go” and “letting go of them”.

Some people, and challenges, obstacles, situations, and of the like, are in your life consistently and constantly because you keep them there. They’ve been trying to leave you. They’ve steadily shown you that you are not a priority, or consideration, or primary concern.

But you feel differently.

You have a different desire. And so you’ve maintained the mediocrity. You’ve kept the relationship and routine going. You’ve chosen to put up with being put last. Or put down. Or put away.

You’ve put everything but you where you’re supposed to be.

Letting them go is not always enough! You have to let go of them. Let go of the idea that you have of who they should, or could, or would be, if not for (insert whatever excuse and reason you might contrive to justify your perpetual support of the foolishness). You have to admit the obvious. Stop pretending that “what it is” is not what it is. Let go of the desire or demand for respect, responsibility, reciprocity. Let go of the want for redemption. Let go of the anticipated idea of regret that you might suffer once it ends. Stop doing that to yourself!

Let go of them. Release the hold that you have on that idea of what might happen if it ends now. Let go of the feeling that you’re owed the realization and materialization of their potential. If they turn out to be who you always knew they could be, with someone else, somewhere else, be okay with that. They were never going to be that person with you. Or for you. Even if they ultimately become that person BECAUSE of you.

Just let go.

Your holding on to something or someone for the sake of pride or guilt or fear or ego or unrequited love or image or perception or expectation or trauma or insecurity or tradition or comfort… is unhealthy. It is not stable. It rarely, if ever, matures into anything other than mess.

Especially when they would have been gone if it was up to them.

But you’ve kept fighting for it, for them.

Fighting every battle but the one most important.

The one for you.

It’s time to fight for you.

-see

@seethepoet