Sometimes, you have to allow the pain to run its course. You have to let the hurt happen. You have to feel it. You have to suffer it. You have to go through it. You have to experience the tragedy, ALL THE WAY THROUGH!
In order for the process to be complete, it must be finished.
Or you will repeat it and remember it and repeat it and redo it and repeat it and reflect it and repeat it and remind yourself of it and repeat it and repeat it and repeat it!
And you have to stop being rescued. You have to avoid being saved from the very thing that will ultimately free you. Loved ones and people who have your best interest at heart will undoubtedly try to help. They are going to try to prevent you from being destroyed. They want to prevent you from having to break as a result of being bent so far. And it is in good intention, with a good heart, that they do this.
But you can’t always let it happen. Because what their “help” is really doing is blocking you from getting stronger, or acknowledging reality, or facing facts. It prevents you from developing the calluses, the tough skin, the hard shell, the wisdom, and the experience of being able to fight. You don’t have to win EVERY fight, but YOU HAVE TO FIGHT. And our loved ones often try to prevent us from having to fight. Because they don’t want us hurt. They don’t want to see us hurt so bad. They want to make our roads easier, our burdens lighter, our problems more solvable.
But sometimes they aren’t equipped with the tools or resources or knowledge to direct us through the process in a way that protects us while positioning us in a posture that produces what we need. They can’t play our part. They can’t prepare us, but for so much. They can’t erase our past. They can’t predict our progress. They can’t prevent “life” from happening.
So we have to be prepared. Preparation is a result of practice. Practice is hands on.
And no one can “practice” for you. No one can play your game for you. You can have coaches, trainers, supporters, cheerleaders, fans, teammates, even heroes that you look up to, but you have to get in the game FOR YOURSELF! You have to do it. You have to do the work.
The ironic truth is that the same energy that is used to suffer is used to succeed. And such are the same tools necessary to achieve. You can avoid “practice”, and nothing happens. Or you can decide to practice and thus you will repeat it and remember it and repeat it and redo it and repeat it and reflect it and repeat it and remind yourself of it and repeat it and repeat it and repeat it!
And the results are victory. Either you win at winning, or you win at losing. And you are going to have to decide and do, for yourself, whichever one you want, winning or losing. No one can do it for you.
The next level, the next stage, the next game, are all waiting. They are all waiting for you. Or not. It depends on you. But they cost. They cost pain and suffering and trial. They cost hurt and tears and sacrifice and loss. They cost friends and family. They cost struggle and discipline and character. They cost energy and strength and will. They cost desire. They will cost you more than you ever thought that you could afford. But if you choose to at least pay attention, you will begin to realize that you’ve already spent towards your success. You’ve already spent time and energy. You’ve wasted time and energy. You’ve lost time and energy.
Not to mention whatever else you’ve invested and lost because of fear or because you got bailed out, or because you were waiting to be bailed out. Too many people fail, not because of trying the wrong thing, but because of trying nothing. And that is the worst thing to try, nothing.
So you might as well. Try. Live. Go. Do. Be.
And repeat it and remember it and repeat it and redo it and repeat it and reflect it and repeat it and remind yourself of it and repeat it and repeat it and repeat it!
©2014 Cornelious “See” Flowers